By Dr. James Dobson
Husband, we’re speaking especially to you tonight. Just as selfishness is a sure marriage killer, an attitude of service and sacrifice–the “I’m Third” philosophy–is an indisputable marriage builder. We urge you to study your wife. What is it that speaks to her heart?
I will never forget the first Valentine’s Day of my marriage, six months after Shirley and I walked down the aisle. It was something of a disaster. I had gone to the USC library that morning and spent eight or ten hours poring over dusty books and journals. It had slipped my mind completely that it was February 14.
Husband, we’re speaking especially to you. Just as selfishness is a sure marriage killer, an attitude of service and sacrifice—the “I’m Third” philosophy—is an indisputable marriage builder. We urge you to study your wife. What is it that speaks to her heart?
Would you be more specific about the relationship between the sexes? Am I to assume you do not favor a fifty-fifty arrangement in the husband-wife interaction?
By Eric Scalise, Ph.D.
When it comes to the brokenness seen in many toxic relationships, including a chaotic marriage, the road to freedom and restoration is often a process. Just as hurt and pain usually develop over a period of time, recovery and healing also tend to follow a progressive journey back toward stability.
We turn our attention now to the relationship between husbands and wives, which reminds me of a telephone call I received recently from a man who had read my previous book The Strong Willed Child. It did not answer his questions. Furthermore, he said he had read my earlier book What Wives Wish Their Husbands Knew About Women, and it didn't satisfy his needs, either.
By Julie Clinton
Tim and I had a rough start to our marriage. We didn’t communicate well. Come to think of it, we didn’t do much of anything well. And of course, it was all his fault. So, I set about trying to change him. And to my disappointed surprise, nothing I did worked! Honestly, we were pretty hateful at times in the way we spoke to each other. Much of it was due to our youth and immaturity. Some of it was due to our circumstances. We were both
By Rebecca Hagelin
My daughter Kristin and I are laughing, crying, and reminiscing our way through the practical preparations for her upcoming wedding. She's marrying a wonderful young man, and my husband and I feel confident that these two young adults will create a strong family together; rich in faith, love, and commitment. So it was particularly sad for me to read a recent Slate article on Dutch women, who scorn marriage as a relic of times gone by. The article's author, NYU professor Katie Roiphe, wrote that she realized during a recent visit to Amsterdam that "having children and not being married was not a big deal…The Dutch attitude…is that marriage is not for everyone; it is a personal choice, an option, a pleasant possibility."
The Greek translation for the word encouragement is parakletos, which literally means "called alongside to help." It brings to mind the scriptural image of two people yoked side by side, as when Jesus said, "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me. . . . For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Matthew 11:29–30).
Question: Dr. Dobson, do you think happily married husbands and wives should be able to live together without fighting?
Question: Dr. Dobson, you've been happily married for more than fifty years now. Have you ever been tempted to be unfaithful to your wife? What are the danger points that those of us who are younger should watch for?
Question: Dr. Dobson, my husband is somewhat insensitive to my needs, but I believe he is willing to do better if I can teach him how I am different from him. Can you help me communicate my needs to him effectively?
Most parents hope that their children will grow to adulthood and find and marry a good spouse. But it’s becoming increasingly difficult for young adults to date in ways that lay a solid foundation for a strong marriage.
By JT Waresak
Regardless of how long you've been married or the age(s) of your children, God's has positioned you to be a leader for your family. Every day you live, you have a chance to be used by God to impact your wife and children. It's time to suit up and get the job done where it matters most–in our own homes.
Who are the most important people in your life? Right now every mother knows whether she is close to her children—she just knows it. Every wife knows whether she’s close to her husband. And you know whether you’re close to God.
We all cherish the milestones and special events in the course of married life: the wedding and honeymoon, the birth of children, the twenty-fifth and fiftieth wedding anniversaries, the kids' high school and college graduations. These are occasions to celebrate with hugs, photographs, and congratulations all around. But don't forget to savor the everyday moments that make up the rest of our days.
Perhaps you are among those who have struggled to comprehend a particular heartache and God's reason for allowing it. A thousand unanswered questions have been recycling in your mind—most of them beginning with "Why...?" You want desperately to trust the Father and believe in His grace and goodness. But deep inside, you're held captive by a sense of betrayal and abandonment.
Most marriage counselors emphasize communication as a foundation for a healthy relationship: Nothing should be withheld from the marital partner.
I recently shared with my 21-year-old daughter that there is a good reason why dads need to be involved in this whole process. We don’t care a lick about how cute a guy may be. To be honest, as a dad, I’m somewhat blind to this because I’m not interested in what he looks like. I care most about who he is.
Would you identify some of the major "marriage killers" that are most responsible for the high divorce rate that plagues today's families?
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