I'm just a girl standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her.
Did you play tag when you were a little girl? I did.
Nestled in the plains of Northeastern Montana was a small church my grandfather had planted years earlier. Each week my sister and I, along with all of the other kids in the church, were anxious for the Sunday School bell to ring. It meant we had 20 minutes to play together before the church service officially began. Tag was the game of choice, and most of the time the boys were “it.” I could never figure out why but even if a boy would tag me, he remained “it” until all of the girls were tagged. I loved being chased by the boys around the church yard. It was innocent and fun. Then we grew up, and it became even more exciting.
How did you feel when your husband, fiancé, or boyfriend began chasing you? You remember, I’m sure. Waiting by the phone for him to call. Being surprised by a bouquet of flowers or a box of candies. Noticing the way he looked at you and wondering when the next date would be or what the adventure he had planned next. Feeling the warmth of his lips on yours. Knowing that you were the only one he wanted to chase, that to him, nobody else in the world was more beautiful than you. Regardless of your age, when you’re chased, the little-girl, giggly feeling resonates.
We all want to be chased. When we are, we relax. We feel beautiful and free.
In their book Captivating, John and Stasi Eldredge describe a woman who feels loved and sought after:
We have all heard it said that a woman is most beautiful when she is in love. It’s true. When a woman knows that she is loved and loved deeply, she glows from the inside. This radiance stems from a heart that has had its deepest questions answered. “Am I lovely? Am I worth fighting for? Have I been and will I continue to be romanced?” God wants us to be captivated by His beauty.
God loves you. And because He does, He is chasing you—yes you, even now.
You might struggle to believe that with so many people and so many problems in the world, God still has time to pursue you, but He does.
Let yourself be caught. His love is like no other.
Receiving it is a choice. You can begin by saying, Yes, Lord, I believe.
Maintaining intimacy with God is also a choice. In today’s world, so much tears at a woman’s heart and competes for her affections. You can unknowingly, unintentionally, and so subtly give your heart to other things. You’ve got to want Him with everything you have! But the Bible promises, “When you come looking for me, you'll find me. ‘Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed’” (Jeremiah 29:13, MSG). Or as the New King James Version says, “And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.”
Referring to seeking God’s beauty, Stasi Eldredge continues, “It is rich. It is good. And it is opposed. To pursue intimacy with Christ, you will have to fight for it.”
Why do you have to fight for it? Because evil hates God’s beauty in you, that’s why.
In his book, Turn Your Life Around, my husband Tim refers to this as the path of “disordered affections,” which occur when we rely on things other than God to fill the hole in our heart. Our affections are disordered when everything in life seems crazy, nothing is in sync, priorities are chaotic, and life is overwhelming. Husband. Kids. Work. Family. In-laws. Vacations. Finances. Church. Laundry. Dinner. The pressures of life begin to take away your affection for God. As a result you spend less time with Him. The less time you have with Him, the less beautiful you feel. And the next thing you know, you no longer feel loved.
Do you see what happens? Idolatry sinks in as we turn to things rather than our Father to calm and soothe the pain—the emptiness or brokenness in our hearts. Tim defines idolatry as “the fruitless pursuit of anything besides God to fill what only He can fill.” Shopping. Food. Bad relationships. Breaking free of idolatry requires discipline and holding on to what Paul believed: “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?...For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:35, 38-39, NKJV).
Daily I have to make a decision to choose to be captured and recaptured by God’s love.
Rest assured that God actively pursues you. Instead of running, however, allow yourself to be caught. Ask to be captured.
When we finally let go we feel lighter than air. We are once again five-year-olds waiting with anticipation to leap off the steps into open arms with a joyful shout and loud laughter, saying, “Daddy, catch me!”
Something beautiful happens in your soul when you finally believe that God’s heart is toward you—no matter what. He is the Dad who doesn’t want you to go anywhere else but into His arms. He is saying, “Come to Me. I am not going to fail you. I want to show you a way to a better life.” He’s been waiting for you.”
Every day, the Creator of the universe, the Most High God, the Giver of Life pursues you. He longs to love you.
Stop running. Let yourself be captured. Let yourself be loved. Let your life begin anew, and rediscover the little girl giggly feeling you so deserve.